<$BlogRSDUrl$>

Thursday, November 28, 2002

exotic
What Type Of Retro Gal Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Thanksgiving went pretty good with my bunch. Aside from my uncles singing this song at me all day.

# posted by Unwinona : 28.11.02

Wednesday, November 27, 2002



The more I ponder Sifl and Olly, the more I love it. Here is a great article about the creator of Sifl & Olly, Liam Lynch. If I could jump into my television and live the rest of my life in some television show, it wouldn't be some dumb sitcom or half-baked cartoon. I would be a sock puppet, dammit. And if someone can somehow make this happen for me, a la Pleasantville, can I be a pink sock? Thank you.



# posted by Unwinona : 27.11.02

Tuesday, November 26, 2002

Today I came home from work and my dad was sitting in his room alone, cleaning his handgun and listening to conservative talk radio. I'm scared.
# posted by Unwinona : 26.11.02
Hurrah! I finally got some extra spending cash so I'm heading to Hot Topic after work to buy some nifty things for Thanksgiving. Last time I was there they had a Tank Girl t-shirt, so here's hoping.

# posted by Unwinona : 26.11.02

Monday, November 25, 2002

And now, a Quiz-Fest

Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

INDIE1
How can I label you?
brought to you by Quizilla

schoolgirl
What's your sexual appeal?
brought to you by Quizilla
What the HUH?


# posted by Unwinona : 25.11.02
More fun family dinner conversation at my place last night. Mum was talking about someone in the neighborhood who died (as so often happens at our table) and mentioned something about colon and then something about polyps. At the exact same time I said "Hee hee, colon" my sister said "Hee hee, polyps." We ARE a grown-up couple of kids.

My house is exploding with cats. I don't know why I went so many years without noticing, but 8 cats is actually quite a large number, cat-wise. Every where you look there is a kitty lurking like a little piranha. And we even have a one-eyed kitty! His name is Stormin' Norman (named by Mum) and he is all orange with a diva complex. He and Stabby Stabitha (the tabby who looks like she's half boa constrictor) spend their days playing what I call "Kitty Rugby." They just tackle each other and then punch each other repeatedly in the head. For HOURS. I guess its fun for them, but hey, what do I know?

peewee
Which Tim Burton's movie charcter are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Um.....




# posted by Unwinona : 25.11.02

Sunday, November 24, 2002


Which Sifl & Olly Show Character Are You?
Brought to you by Fifth Dream Today.


Say, do you like sitting down with a big bowl of popcorn and watching Return of the Jedi? Well stop right now! Didn't you know that The Force is a Tool of Satan? While you're spooked out of your gourd by that, check out a website devoted to a love of, and for, Ninjas.

Every high school had at least one gothic person who liked to hang out in graveyards and hiss at people. For Wasatch High School, that was me. I'm on the far left in the shiny skirt of some sort. I'm told you could see my undies through it but oh well. Eventually I'll get pictures taken in the last four years posted on here, promise.



Last night was a pretty swell time. Went to my improv workshop as usual and stuck around to see the show. Went out for ice cream with the gang.
# posted by Unwinona : 24.11.02

Friday, November 22, 2002

Are people in this country really this stupid? Oh wait, this guy is.

Want to know what you wear to Thanksgiving says about you as a person? Head to Gurl and play the Thanksgiving edition of Paperdoll Psychology. I have.

Saw Chamber of Secrets again. Still attracted to 13 year old male leads of film. Dammit. Send all my future mail to Handbasket #14, Special Pervert Hell, Underworld.
I'm%20going%20to%20Hell%20because%20I%20like%20Harry%20Potter!
Why Will You Go To Hell?
brought to you by Quizilla


And Oh WOW. Today at work I saw a pleasantly plump lady in her seventies whip off her cross-stitched bible verse sweatshirt. Granny bosoms are best left covered so as not to scare youngster secretaries.
# posted by Unwinona : 22.11.02

Wednesday, November 20, 2002

Also: I've added his blog to my list of favorites. Sweet, sweet Wil. You were there for me when I was smart and awkward and liked Star Trek. Plus you were in The Last Starfighter and I always loved you. Kiss kiss.
# posted by Unwinona : 20.11.02
Hooray! Do YOU know what time it is??
Its Wil Wheaton time!
# posted by Unwinona : 20.11.02
Speaking of the D.I., I am shocked and dismayed that something like this could happen. Okay, so I don't care. Meh.
# posted by Unwinona : 20.11.02
Yesterday I went to the Deseret Industries thrift store(known as the D.I. to Utah locals) and looked for some new records for my wonderful twelve dollar record player/tape deck. Score! Now I have the soundtracks to My Fair Lady, Dirty Dancing, Saturday Night Fever, and Breakfast at Tiffany's.

Kudos to my friend Kelli Harris for being a brilliant writer of all things to be written. She knows what I'm talking about. You'll all hear about her when she has films at Sundance and I'm camping out on her doorstep in a stinky sleeping bag begging for a part in them.

Hooray! Have a casting call for Legally Blonde 2!! I'll be the best extra I can be, if they'll only let me. I promise this time I won't make a rush for the snack cart when no one important is looking.
# posted by Unwinona : 20.11.02

Tuesday, November 19, 2002

I am Jasmine!
Which Disney Princess are you?



Ooooh, that Alladin's such a fox.

# posted by Unwinona : 19.11.02
Apparently Cosmopolitan knows me too well...damn. I thought I could fool them, but they saw through my deceit and branded me a Perma-Party Girl. Hey, is it my fault I'm addicted to the dream of being Carrie Bradshaw?

oliver
Which Harry Potter Guy are you Most Compatible with?
brought to you by Quizilla


Which Harry Potter Guy are you Most Compatible with?
brought to you by Quizilla

Yes, I took this twice to get both answers I wanted. Wouldn't YOU have done the same? Well, wouldn't you???



# posted by Unwinona : 19.11.02

Sunday, November 17, 2002

And the prize for the most random TGI Fridays moment goes to my friend Joe, for sitting underneath the large kitschy tuba mounted on the wall. Long story short, he tried to toss some food in the air and catch it in his mouth, and instead tossed it right up and into the tuba. Clunk. I wonder how much food is actually in that novelty tuba.

I have nothing to say today so I suggest you all go hang out at Gurl.com because its much cooler anyway.
# posted by Unwinona : 17.11.02

Friday, November 15, 2002

Well, there is officially something wrong with me. Just got home from Chamber of Secrets and I'm suddenly nursing a wicked bad crush on not-so-little Draco Malfoy. I'm a terrible, cradlerobbing, villain-loving fool. I hope my darling Sean Biggerstaff doesn't hold it against me...
I've decided Hogwarts is that wizard school where all the girls want to go because its full of magical hotties. They all mill around outside the fashion shops in Diagon Alley and talk about it "Say, are you going to the Quidditch match today? We're playing Hogwarts!" "Ooooh! I'll wear my new robes." "That Ravenclaw Seeker sure is dreamy, but he's no Oliver Woods." Then they go buy some self-conjuring nail-polish and head home to watch Dawson's Magical Creek.
# posted by Unwinona : 15.11.02
# posted by Unwinona : 15.11.02
Happy Chamber of Secrets Day!!! I'll be in line for my tickets as soon as I cash my paycheck and get off work. Mwa ha ha. For the rest of you suckers who might have to wait a whole two days to see it, pass the time by reading this piece of Harry Potter Envy. I especially like the line comparing Harry Potter's fancy flying broom to a Lexus in a high school parking lot.

Secretarial Things This Secretary Will Never Do
1. Tape "Kathy" comic strips everywhere
2. Tape "Dilbert" comic strips everywhere
3. Wear nylons
4. Keep photos of my relatives' babies everywhere
5. Make ANYONE coffee
6. Gab about the weather with every single damn patient
7. Skip lunch to file things
8. Stay late to file things
9. Agree with my boss that his day of five patients kissing his arse and a really long lunch was a "toughie"
10. Refer to myself as an "Office Manager" to feel more important.
# posted by Unwinona : 15.11.02

Thursday, November 14, 2002

If The Onion was an attractive, rich man, I would marry it for articles like this one about Winona Ryder.
# posted by Unwinona : 14.11.02

Wednesday, November 13, 2002

I'm Ron Weasley!

You're kind and supportive and even though you're not always in the centre of attention and don't trouble
yourself with every detail, your friends cherish your loyalty and your sence of humour.
You're a dreamer and you know the most important things in life aren't 'things'.

Who are YOU?
# posted by Unwinona : 13.11.02
I need more sleep. Today I woke up five minutes before I had to leave (again) and threw myself together. I reached down to pick a book up off the floor and felt something heavy on my back. I freaked out for a minute...is it a cat? Giant brain-eating spider?? What is it?!?
Half a second later I realized it was my backpack and calmed down. Doesn't it make everyone feel very safe that I'm driving the highways of America?
# posted by Unwinona : 13.11.02

Monday, November 11, 2002

Wow, some people are so dumb they make me feel like I could rule the world with my brains alone. Naw, this isn't Harry Potter, Tanya Grotter is completely different....completely different.......

Yes, I own a "Free Winona" t-shirt. I'm wearing it right now. But here is my two cents on the issue:
Why is every damn article on the subject of this trial so shocked that a rich woman is shoplifting??? Every article includes some sort of statement to the effect of "We don't know why a wealthy woman would shoplift blah blah blah" and I have to wonder. Do the people who write these articles really think that most shoplifters are little poor families, dressed in rags, stuffing cans of food into their tattered pockets to keep themselves alive? I thought it was common knowledge that most caught shoplifters admit they had the means to pay for the things they took. Shoplifting isn't about taking things you need. People steal because they want a thrill, or they want to be "dangerous" or they want attention or help. It isn't that remarkable that a rich famous woman shoplifts, because people of all ages, races, creeds, and colors shoplift. She has a problem, obviously. Its a crime, yes. But I guess if you're famous you're exempt from having problems....only little starving Timmy and his orphan sisters can have legit reasons to be shoplifting.


# posted by Unwinona : 11.11.02

Sunday, November 10, 2002

Hurrah! Yesterday was wunnerful....
Thanks to the boys at Milo Skateboards for helping a girly-girl in a store full of "dudes" find her very first skateboard. They didn't even laugh at me when I almost fell off testing out the wheels and were kind enough to mark the front from the back. I have, in fact, already learned a trick on it. But my trick only works standing still on a thick rug to keep me from rolling wildly away.

Met a nice boy named Bijan who has been backpacking in Thailand. As he was telling me about backpacking in Thailand, all I could think to myself was "Man I SUCK. I've never backpacked in Thailand." I felt sort-of left out until I remembered I've been on guided tours of four old jails, Williamsburg (I spilled olde timey cider on my pants), AND the home of Abraham Lincoln. So tra la la.
# posted by Unwinona : 10.11.02

Saturday, November 09, 2002

whinewhinewhine......
Why are there so many wonderful things to buy online??? why????
Super Fantastico
Grrl Shwag-O-Rama
J-List Japanese Imports

I just want to be Tank Girl and loot what I need in a post-apocalyptic future. If anyone tries to stop me, I'll just run them over with my cool tank.
# posted by Unwinona : 9.11.02

Friday, November 08, 2002

For those out there who share my weird obsession with lobsters, this piece from the Onion will have you snapping yer claws with laughter...then stick around and read the rest of this weeks issue. Whatever.
Freddy the Lobster's Story
# posted by Unwinona : 8.11.02
Well, my painting is coming along nicely, and I finally have a roommate for Seattle....its Aubrey!! Hurrah! It's perfect. We both adore Tank Girl, need a change of scene, and then there's the whole thing where we've been best friends since eighth grade.

I have an eyelash in my eye and it really hurts.
# posted by Unwinona : 8.11.02

Wednesday, November 06, 2002

THE OTHER ONE

Dear God, please let me become succesful at acting, because if I don't I'll have to become a bank robber or something notorious. Why you ask? Because if I don't do something large and obvious and "mwaaaa" in your face, I will die and be buried and my tombstone will read "Linden Webb, 1982-XXXX, and below it in big letters, THE OTHER ONE."
It never fails. I feel like Kit from A League of Their Own. I am "the other daughter." Not the one the parents have stories about, the other one. Whenever I am with my parents, and they run into friends, it goes like this:
GPF (Generic Parental Friend): So is this one of yours?
Parent: Yes, this is our daughter, Linden.
GPF: So are you the horse-rider?
Parent: No, thats her sister.
GPF: Then you must be the swimmer.
Parent: No, thats Angie. This is the OTHER ONE.

I'm usually standing in the background, pretending to be very interested in a box of Count Chocula or my wristwatch. It always strikes me as cruel and rather telling that my parents never once say "Oh, Linden just graduated from college" or "Linden is in acting." In my family, if your activities are not approved of, apparently they don't exist. Someday I will be famous and then my parents will be on TV going "We always supported her in her endeavors." and I will sit at home in my solid gold recliner watching them on my solid gold widescreen and throw my drink at the TV.
# posted by Unwinona : 6.11.02

Tuesday, November 05, 2002

At least I know whatever happens, this painting will always cheer me up.

Brought to you by delicious cheese fries and fry sauce from Training Table. Mmmm, cheese fries.

# posted by Unwinona : 5.11.02
The signs are pointing to one simple truth: I've lived at home too long. When I graduated from college, I meant to stay a month and then breeze out of town. Now I'm coming up on 5 months. Granted, I'm earning money responsibly for a big honking move to Seattle, but I just feel like some 40 year old weirdo who should be spending time eating fried cheese and "hanging out" in teen chatrooms.
Last night I got into another pointless debate (translates to: raging battle of personalities). My mum got mad because she was talking about the first man to summit Everest, and I said something about "what if someone made it years ago but no one ever knew?" and she started yelling at me. Apparently it doesn't "count" if anyone did make it, which would have been impossible anyway, because it only "counts" if you make it to the top, and come back down, and it is documented. I didn't realizing I was playing another round of "who won and who lost" as we do so often in my home. Man that was lamey lame lame.

Watched Carrie on NBC. Not too shabby. Certainly better than Carrie 2. Sadly, I really missed Tommy Ross with a perm.
# posted by Unwinona : 5.11.02

Monday, November 04, 2002


Which Colossal Death Robot Are You?

My Mormon name is DaLinda LaDale Busbyberkly Jukebox-Jezabel!
What's yours?


Yeah! I'm....um...doubly-mormonised!


Take the Affliction Test Today!
Can anyone tell I'm trying really really hard to slack off?
# posted by Unwinona : 4.11.02

What kind of drunk are you?

I always wondered...
# posted by Unwinona : 4.11.02
Does anyone else miss Sifl and Olly?

When my Grandmother would leave on her trips to Boise, I would eagerly volunteer to babysit her house and surly cats because she had cable, and if I stayed up until 1 in the morning, I could watch Sifl and Olly on MTV....damn that was a good show.
# posted by Unwinona : 4.11.02
Been playing a little online MASH:
You live in a Apartment.
You're married to a Pirate.
You drive a really big box with wheels.
Your car is the color turquoise.
You live in the state Washington.
Your honeymoon is the seven seas.
Your occupation is a bar wench.
You have this many kids: 1 (0 male; 1 female).

You live in a Mansion.
You're married to a Newsy.
You drive a rocket ship.
Your car is the color blue.
You live in the state New York.
Your honeymoon is Mesquite Nevada.
Your occupation is a hand model.
You have this many kids: 8 (0 male; 8 female).
# posted by Unwinona : 4.11.02
Did not get the job I wanted...will be miserable secretary until I move/die. Ah well. Here's a little ditty I just made up, to the tune of "California" by Phantom Planet:
Gonna kill my boss
Gonna kill my boss,
Gooooona kill my boss,
kill my bo-oosssss............

Customers Suck is saving my life right now.
# posted by Unwinona : 4.11.02

Sunday, November 03, 2002

And the psychotic torture award for the evening goes to my parents and current landlords...the only two people on the planet who can needle me for weeks, insult me, reject all my ideas, be lofty idealists when I'm feeling lazy, pessimists when I'm feeling full of ideas and happy with the world, generally act ugly and then once I snap, confront me with shaking heads about how I seem to be having "emotional problems."
Yes, I do have an emotional problem. Its my current location. So my question is this:
Are we doomed to become our parents? Or by observing what bitter frustrated individuals mine happen to be do I learn what not to be? Should I be grateful, or afraid? Anyone?
# posted by Unwinona : 3.11.02
Well, I feel like I filled my quota of Halloween fun.
1. I went to my first ever cliche frat party. There was a guy passed out on the lawn, a tiki bar built into the basement, cops breaking it up after forty-five minutes, things like that.

2. I went to see Mystery of Irma Vep. This is by far the weirdest, most confusing play I have ever laid eyes upon. It was a quick change act, a clever idea, and a whole bunch of other completely unrelated things all thrown together in a blender and mixed on "Puree". Bits of it were funny but overall I was just really really confused.
Not nearly as much as I was when watching A.I. in the theatres, but much more than I would watching television at home or Rent or something.

3. I ate candy for breakfast every day for a week.

By the way, apologies to everyone I callously ditched at acting class to go see Jackass the Movie, but it was worth it mwaha ha ha ha ha.

# posted by Unwinona : 3.11.02

Friday, November 01, 2002

I can't decide which fictional character I would rather fall in love with; Would it be Holden Caulfield, or the mysterious author Lemony Snicket? Hmmmm.
# posted by Unwinona : 1.11.02

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?